my partner is leaving me, i quit my job, i need to get my practice back

Q: Gary, I am having a hard time right now. my partner and I are breaking up, suddenly, with no warning. I also decided to quit my job. I feel like the earth is just opening up beneath me and swallowing me whole.

gary weber

I think it is ultimately for the best. I am feeling now that the Universe is punishing me for not doing the work I am meant to do. I have forsaken my practice so that I can stay asleep in this relationship. I thought I could just hunker down and now I am suffering the painful, painful consequences.


I am at the absolute bottom. I need help...I want to get back into practicing. Can you help me? I feel so foolish for having let it get to this point again...I am exhausted. I am reaching out because I don't know where else to turn.


G. 


 Namaste.


Carl Jung had a routine/practice of when patients/friends of his said they had gotten a great promotion, etc. of meeting w/them and disconsolately, sadly telling them how much he felt badly for them for how much they would be compromised and likely unhappy in their continued efforts in the same vein. Conversely, when he met with someone who had just lost their job, partner, etc., he had a great celebration w/champagne, etc. as now, he excitedly told them, they would have the opportunity for a whole new life with many exciting possibilities.


As far as this being the Universe "punishing" you, that would seem to be impossible...since you are Her. She's not stupid, after all She is the Universe. She just wants to explore some other facet of Herself through this vehicle on which She has lavished so much care and attention...


"you" plunged into manifest uncertainty when you remanifested where you did...that worked out for a while, and then it stopped working. It will be fascinating to see how this dances now.


As the Universe said, through the Bhagavad Gita in one of its most famous and quoted verses, Ch. XI, verse 22, more or less faithfully rendered on p. 122 of Her/Ramana Maharshi's book, "Happiness Beyond Thought", "I take care of the needs of those who seek Me, meditate upon Me, see themselves as not separate from Me and see Me in everything".


i have found that to be unerringly true; the more i surrendered, and saw Her as not separate from me, and saw Her in everything...the more i was sheltered and held, even when it appeared to be a very not good time, in fact, particularly so then...


As far as getting back into practice, just do it. As Yoda said, "there is no 'try', there is only 'do' or 'not do'". you have had many years of great practice, just pick it up again.


As far as feeling "so foolish for having let it get to this point again", do as we did at the end of our group practices as we chanted "lokah, samastha, sukhinu, bhavantu" (p. 38 of the aforementioned book), "may all beings in all worlds (on all planes) have peace, happiness and well-being".


Remember that on the first repetition, we wished those close to us, well-being; on the second repetition, we wished someone w/whom we have been having difficulty, well-being; the third repetition, we wished that most troubled of beings, ourselves, well-being". Give yourself that deep wish of "well-being" and much great and boundless self-compassion. you are performing perfectly a magnificent dance of the Universe's making.


Trust this is helpful.




stillness and surrender